A stringy, teenage guy approached me at the gym yesterday. While he may not have had a tripod with him, he definitely belonged to that social media-dependent crowd. He was polite, calling me “sir”—a common courtesy here in the South—and said, “You have the most detailed calves I’ve ever seen in my life.” Normally, I would have cracked a joke like, “How long could that possibly have taken?” or “You should have seen them 50 pounds ago.” However, I’ve been trying to embrace my downsizing, a necessity of aging, so I simply replied, “Thank you.”
Then he asked the inevitable, dreaded question: “What did you do to get them to look like that?” The short answer would be, “four trillion reps.” But who likes short answers? Certainly not this kid; it was as if he were holding a paper airplane and asking me to explain how the space shuttle works. That’s my go-to opinion these days. The problem I have with most kids under 30 is that they are so conditioned to instant gratification that the idea of dedicating years to achieve noticeable results seems inconceivable, akin to asking them to give up their iPhones.
Let me share a quick anecdote: several years ago, I spoke at a bodybuilding seminar in Mexico City. My topic was the enormous amount of fake and counterfeit steroids on the black market there. After the seminar, a young, bloated, pimple-covered kid in his 20s approached me with a jug of ISS protein powder under his arm. At the time, Jay Cutler was Mr. Olympia, and he was under contract with ISS, so his picture was on the product label.
The kid handed me the jug and asked if it was real or fake. I was bewildered; while Mexicans were counterfeiting steroids back then, they had not yet started counterfeiting American supplements. Just getting his hands on such a product required some degree of smuggling, as it was not available in Mexican supplement stores. I examined the jug; the label was legitimate, and the contents looked right. I told him so as I screwed the top back on and handed it back to him. When I asked why he thought the product was fake, he replied — and I swear this is true — “I drank one shake last night and one this morning, and I still don’t look like the guy on the label.”
This conversation took place in Spanish, so I asked him to repeat what he had said, just to be sure I hadn’t misunderstood. Nope, I got it right the first time. He genuinely believed that a couple of doses of whey protein would give him Mr. O’s physique. It was so innocent it was almost endearing, yet it highlighted the prevailing cluelessness and shameless disdain for delayed gratification among younger generations.
I’ve had numerous similarly baffling encounters since then—probably why I’m bald. I hate sounding like the old man longing for the good old days, but it’s true: The pioneers of modern bodybuilding—all those guys standing in front of Gold’s Gym in that iconic picture? While the photo is captioned with the word “pioneers,” and to some reasonable extent that’s correct, the reality is they were a wrecking crew. The moment that shot was taken, they all turned around and went back inside to resume beating the crap out of themselves. There were more than a few who made a show of how much they were lifting, how many reps they could do, the pain they could endure, and the shots they were hitting in the mirror. They are called pioneers not only because they paved the way, but also because they didn’t turn and run when they discovered the truth.
That accepted level of pride in one’s work defined the ethos that flowed to various pockets of the country and infected certain lucky cities with a brand of hardcore gym culture that ultimately shaped an era of the best physiques on the planet. But I digress; suffice it to say that there is a well-sliced pie chart representing what goes into building something noteworthy under your shirt, and today’s topic — patience — is merely one piece of that pie.
So, back to what I did to build my calves: I told the kid that I trained them like I trained the rest of my body — really hard for a really long time. How long? Let’s put it this way: I started weight training when I was 12 and haven’t missed more than a few weeks of training ever since, and I’m 64 at the time of this writing. When during this long journey can I say my calves became noticeable? I don’t know. But I felt confident telling him it wasn’t anytime during the first ten years. In fact, you could probably extend that to 20 years. The truth is, I told him, I wasn’t really happy with my physique until I was in my 50s.
Jasminko Ibrakovic
If the kid were a balloon, I had just stuck a hundred pins into him. I thought he might throw his belt in a corner and go home to take up stamp collecting. Seeing the deflated look on his face, I tried to soften the reality for him. “Look, kid, the most important aspect of bodybuilding you need to understand is that while you may desire a pair of twenty-four-inch, beautifully detailed, veiny calves, your body does not. Your body wants efficiency — to do the most with the least amount of energy.
If you want huge, striated calves, you have to force your body to build them. Co-opting Mother Nature in such a way doesn’t come easy or quickly. It requires focus, discipline, a willingness to suffer, immutable desire, and time — lots and lots of time. No amount of food, drugs, or supplements can mitigate the time factor. Youngsters like you need years of grinding with really basic exercises to achieve notable results. Genetics will move the needle a bit in either direction, but there’s no way around it. The most important thing you can cultivate as a bodybuilder is your patience, and you’d better learn that now.
I’m not saying you have to wait until you’re 50 to achieve a physique you’re happy with — I’m an odd case. I’ve seen guys make gains that made them happy in just a couple of years. What I’m trying to convey is that there is an unavoidable and non-negotiable time commitment to not only build muscle but to shape and detail it. It literally takes years, and there are no shortcuts or easy buttons.
You must work hard — again, for years — to build a decent physique. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you can settle into the long haul and pay the necessary dues. If you do and go the distance, then one day, some eager, wide-eyed youngster might come up to you and give you that same compliment. I certainly remember asking some of those “pioneers” in the Gold’s Gym picture for help back in the day. I wasn’t always happy with their answers, but they always turned out to be true. Just like I did, you newcomers will ultimately learn that “the truth hurts.”
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Then he asked the inevitable, dreaded question: “What did you do to get them to look like that?” The short answer would be, “four trillion reps.” But who likes short answers? Certainly not this kid; it was as if he were holding a paper airplane and asking me to explain how the space shuttle works. That’s my go-to opinion these days. The problem I have with most kids under 30 is that they are so conditioned to instant gratification that the idea of dedicating years to achieve noticeable results seems inconceivable, akin to asking them to give up their iPhones.
Let me share a quick anecdote: several years ago, I spoke at a bodybuilding seminar in Mexico City. My topic was the enormous amount of fake and counterfeit steroids on the black market there. After the seminar, a young, bloated, pimple-covered kid in his 20s approached me with a jug of ISS protein powder under his arm. At the time, Jay Cutler was Mr. Olympia, and he was under contract with ISS, so his picture was on the product label.
The kid handed me the jug and asked if it was real or fake. I was bewildered; while Mexicans were counterfeiting steroids back then, they had not yet started counterfeiting American supplements. Just getting his hands on such a product required some degree of smuggling, as it was not available in Mexican supplement stores. I examined the jug; the label was legitimate, and the contents looked right. I told him so as I screwed the top back on and handed it back to him. When I asked why he thought the product was fake, he replied — and I swear this is true — “I drank one shake last night and one this morning, and I still don’t look like the guy on the label.”
The Unreasonable Quest for Big Gains in Little Time
This conversation took place in Spanish, so I asked him to repeat what he had said, just to be sure I hadn’t misunderstood. Nope, I got it right the first time. He genuinely believed that a couple of doses of whey protein would give him Mr. O’s physique. It was so innocent it was almost endearing, yet it highlighted the prevailing cluelessness and shameless disdain for delayed gratification among younger generations.
I’ve had numerous similarly baffling encounters since then—probably why I’m bald. I hate sounding like the old man longing for the good old days, but it’s true: The pioneers of modern bodybuilding—all those guys standing in front of Gold’s Gym in that iconic picture? While the photo is captioned with the word “pioneers,” and to some reasonable extent that’s correct, the reality is they were a wrecking crew. The moment that shot was taken, they all turned around and went back inside to resume beating the crap out of themselves. There were more than a few who made a show of how much they were lifting, how many reps they could do, the pain they could endure, and the shots they were hitting in the mirror. They are called pioneers not only because they paved the way, but also because they didn’t turn and run when they discovered the truth.
That accepted level of pride in one’s work defined the ethos that flowed to various pockets of the country and infected certain lucky cities with a brand of hardcore gym culture that ultimately shaped an era of the best physiques on the planet. But I digress; suffice it to say that there is a well-sliced pie chart representing what goes into building something noteworthy under your shirt, and today’s topic — patience — is merely one piece of that pie.
So, back to what I did to build my calves: I told the kid that I trained them like I trained the rest of my body — really hard for a really long time. How long? Let’s put it this way: I started weight training when I was 12 and haven’t missed more than a few weeks of training ever since, and I’m 64 at the time of this writing. When during this long journey can I say my calves became noticeable? I don’t know. But I felt confident telling him it wasn’t anytime during the first ten years. In fact, you could probably extend that to 20 years. The truth is, I told him, I wasn’t really happy with my physique until I was in my 50s.
Jasminko Ibrakovic
Consistency Is the Greatest Training Supplement
If the kid were a balloon, I had just stuck a hundred pins into him. I thought he might throw his belt in a corner and go home to take up stamp collecting. Seeing the deflated look on his face, I tried to soften the reality for him. “Look, kid, the most important aspect of bodybuilding you need to understand is that while you may desire a pair of twenty-four-inch, beautifully detailed, veiny calves, your body does not. Your body wants efficiency — to do the most with the least amount of energy.
If you want huge, striated calves, you have to force your body to build them. Co-opting Mother Nature in such a way doesn’t come easy or quickly. It requires focus, discipline, a willingness to suffer, immutable desire, and time — lots and lots of time. No amount of food, drugs, or supplements can mitigate the time factor. Youngsters like you need years of grinding with really basic exercises to achieve notable results. Genetics will move the needle a bit in either direction, but there’s no way around it. The most important thing you can cultivate as a bodybuilder is your patience, and you’d better learn that now.
I’m not saying you have to wait until you’re 50 to achieve a physique you’re happy with — I’m an odd case. I’ve seen guys make gains that made them happy in just a couple of years. What I’m trying to convey is that there is an unavoidable and non-negotiable time commitment to not only build muscle but to shape and detail it. It literally takes years, and there are no shortcuts or easy buttons.
You must work hard — again, for years — to build a decent physique. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you can settle into the long haul and pay the necessary dues. If you do and go the distance, then one day, some eager, wide-eyed youngster might come up to you and give you that same compliment. I certainly remember asking some of those “pioneers” in the Gold’s Gym picture for help back in the day. I wasn’t always happy with their answers, but they always turned out to be true. Just like I did, you newcomers will ultimately learn that “the truth hurts.”
Continue reading...
